T'other blog has been updated see what ye think guys!
istockimageoftheday
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Wednesday, December 09, 2009
All That Jazz
"A 1920s-themed Christmas tree decoration party, eh?"
Is what I said to myself when the Bear took it upon himself to invite me to his friend's house party this Friday. While the craic is indeed bound to be mighty, what the flip am I supposed to wear to it? Especially since we'll be at yet another Dead Flags gig in Whelans beforehand. Yes, they're THAT GOOD. GO TO IT. (Upstairs at 8, a mere tenner in, you do the math...ok there's actually no math, don't worry. It was a trick.)
So back to my problem. While it would be a MINIMUM of twelve kinds of amazing to show up at Whelans looking like 1920s superfreak Theda Bara, before skipping off partywards into the night, with a bottle of rum in my vampy hand, it's unfortunately more than a little unlikely. Plus, it's rather chilly out to only be wearing snake shaped boob jewellery. And skipping would inevitably lead to various wardrobe malfunctions of the tits-falling-out variety. As it were.
Theda's got a bone to pick with you, bitch.
Is what I said to myself when the Bear took it upon himself to invite me to his friend's house party this Friday. While the craic is indeed bound to be mighty, what the flip am I supposed to wear to it? Especially since we'll be at yet another Dead Flags gig in Whelans beforehand. Yes, they're THAT GOOD. GO TO IT. (Upstairs at 8, a mere tenner in, you do the math...ok there's actually no math, don't worry. It was a trick.)
So back to my problem. While it would be a MINIMUM of twelve kinds of amazing to show up at Whelans looking like 1920s superfreak Theda Bara, before skipping off partywards into the night, with a bottle of rum in my vampy hand, it's unfortunately more than a little unlikely. Plus, it's rather chilly out to only be wearing snake shaped boob jewellery. And skipping would inevitably lead to various wardrobe malfunctions of the tits-falling-out variety. As it were.
Theda's got a bone to pick with you, bitch.
However, the most probable outcome will possibly be me in whatever I'd normally wear (unless I raid TCup and Mazatron's respective wardrobes and find that one of them has been harbouring a Velma Kelly costume all this time...) and a Penney's headband with a few stray seagull feathers jammed into it. Maybe not seagull actually, maybe a magic bird like this one will be somehow trapped in the back garden when I get home.
I'll go ask him why he's upside down and help him regain his freedom, all the while surreptitiously pilfering some of his feathers. He might get narky about it if he catches me but I'll explain my predicament and he'll understand and decide not to peck me in the eye.
Oh and I also have to bring a Christmas tree decoration. Hence the mouthful of a party title.
I'll go ask him why he's upside down and help him regain his freedom, all the while surreptitiously pilfering some of his feathers. He might get narky about it if he catches me but I'll explain my predicament and he'll understand and decide not to peck me in the eye.
Oh and I also have to bring a Christmas tree decoration. Hence the mouthful of a party title.
Tuesday, December 08, 2009
Place Your Bets
Henry's handling balls, Tiger's been sinking them where he shouldn't (and other such ball-related jokes), so what's going to go horribly and publicly wrong for Federer?
Monday, December 07, 2009
We started a new blog with our buddies
Check it out it's istockoftheday and it does exactly what it says on the tin! Have a look see what ye think!
Perfume Ads checklist
Well it's that time of year again where all the ads on the telly are trying to get your attention and get you into the siopa buying their wares! And even as I write this with the telly on in the back ground one or two or a million perfume ads have popped up. These ads must have a check list surely. They are pretty much all the same. Can you imagine the advertising studio when they are coming with the 'concepts'.
Advertising Genius; right so peeps can we loike go thru the checklist just to see do we have everything, ya?
Minions; ya sure roight so um the checklist
AG; Roight here we go! Moody male actor dressed in black or nothing at all/Female actress slash model prancing around like a mad wan
Minions; mmmm check
AG; Well known song but with an airy light filter effect, ya?
Minions; check
AG; The ad was done in Black and white for male / colour for a female, ya?
Minions; check
AG; Male Voiceover with an ability to say the title in a french accent?
Minions; check
AG; Ya fab lets do it!
(p.s. does anyone else have violent urges towards sienna miller when they see her head pop up in that gucci ad? no? anyone? just me then)
Tuesday, December 01, 2009
Dear Santa first things first i want...
...these heels.
drool!
Available at Office
And here's why, this Thursday is mine and Kitty's first Chrimbo party for this festive season. The Fashion Bloggers' Brunch - Nov/Dec Bumper Christmas Issue if you will. Now I feel a little of a fraud of late as I have neglected the fashion side of this blog, even though I have splurged on one or two new items in recent times, most notable a fab red velvet vintage jacket that I bought for a song in London! (maybe I'll wear that on Thursday?) So anyway back to the brunch I'm looking forward to it, only problem is what the fudge do I wear? It starts at 6pm and I'll only be in the door from work and still in my smelly work clothes. So I've been thinking I'll have to up the stakes on Thursday in the wardrobe department at work so I can head straight there. I don't wear suits or pencil skirts to the office I usually end up wearing a pair of jeans and a hoody, now a fabulous pair of jeans and a fab hoody it most be noted, but still it's forest casual out the door. So Thursday might see me tottering into work with something a little bit more urban casual (I'm making this up as i go along) than forest! If you catch my drift, Santa?
I think Santa the rest is up to you! You have my address.
drool!
Available at Office
And here's why, this Thursday is mine and Kitty's first Chrimbo party for this festive season. The Fashion Bloggers' Brunch - Nov/Dec Bumper Christmas Issue if you will. Now I feel a little of a fraud of late as I have neglected the fashion side of this blog, even though I have splurged on one or two new items in recent times, most notable a fab red velvet vintage jacket that I bought for a song in London! (maybe I'll wear that on Thursday?) So anyway back to the brunch I'm looking forward to it, only problem is what the fudge do I wear? It starts at 6pm and I'll only be in the door from work and still in my smelly work clothes. So I've been thinking I'll have to up the stakes on Thursday in the wardrobe department at work so I can head straight there. I don't wear suits or pencil skirts to the office I usually end up wearing a pair of jeans and a hoody, now a fabulous pair of jeans and a fab hoody it most be noted, but still it's forest casual out the door. So Thursday might see me tottering into work with something a little bit more urban casual (I'm making this up as i go along) than forest! If you catch my drift, Santa?
I think Santa the rest is up to you! You have my address.
Sunday, November 29, 2009
He's Going To Be A Time Traveller
I think we can all agree (since I'm assuming that everyone watched the Late Late Toy Show. You all did, right?) that the absolute highlight of the entire show, the one who rose above all the overacheiving Billy Barry Brats, the precocious posh kids, the weird culchie child and even outshone the appearance of John and Edward, (despite one of them splitting their pants and saying "oh shit" on live national telly on the biggest kids TV event of the year) was the fantastically articulate, the amazing...John Joe.
The tweed suit, the eccentric mannerisms, the love of clocks...I had never even heard of horology until John Joe and he completely stole the show. Right this minute I'm watching the repeat to catch him again. Especially the part where the conversation moved on to Harry Potter and deadly little John Joe was too immersed in examining a clock that needs fixing to care what else might be going on.
Awesome.
The tweed suit, the eccentric mannerisms, the love of clocks...I had never even heard of horology until John Joe and he completely stole the show. Right this minute I'm watching the repeat to catch him again. Especially the part where the conversation moved on to Harry Potter and deadly little John Joe was too immersed in examining a clock that needs fixing to care what else might be going on.
Awesome.
Friday, November 27, 2009
Letter of Complaint
Dear Fuckface ( aka People I Work For)
Oh, I'm ever so sorry, you see when I took on this job with the assurance that I would be paid the same, if not more (Wow! How fortune has favoured me! Thought I.) as my last job, which was in an actual design studio with nice colourful mugs and work I quite enjoyed doing, I foolishly thought that this would in fact, be the case. I mean I really should have realised that what you actually meant was "we're paying you less than that, we thought you knew though, so either take it or go fuck yourself".
I can also see now that it's really an inspired money saving technique to equip the design studio with computers that were bought back when the Ketchup Song was in the charts and Nickelback just had their first big hit, which would make them SEVEN YEARS old, oh and the software hasn't been updated in three or four years you say? Fantastic! That's just the kind of challenge I so look forward to, nothing makes me happier than a computer that's so slow it makes me want to peel off my eyelids, or a printer that spits out pages with the artwork going sideways for no good reason, not to mention when my computer randomly dies or takes ten minutes to open a bigger-than-average file in Photoshop, that kind of thing just makes me feel so alive, y'know?
Just as a suggestion, you might want to give new employees this handy guide on their first day in their shiny new job, explaining what certain phrases or instructions really mean.
We say:
We want to give this product a new look, move away from the old identity.
We mean:
Make it look the same as the old one, but more obnoxious and garish.
We say:
Yeah, that looks great now.
We mean:
I'll be back in half an hour to get you to change everything while I stand over your shoulder and instruct you to move and resize things in a manner that will make you want to unzip your boot and beat me around the head with it.
We say:
You'll be getting a pay review in four months.
We mean:
You'll be getting a pay review in six months.
We say:
Next time, make sure you get a full brief from us.
We mean:
Next time, don't bother trying to make it look well designed and thought out, just make everything bright red and twice the size it should be. Like how a flyer would look if it was shouting in your face, knocking things over and banging cymbals together. Visually, like.
Thank fuck the Toy Show is on tonight.
Oh, I'm ever so sorry, you see when I took on this job with the assurance that I would be paid the same, if not more (Wow! How fortune has favoured me! Thought I.) as my last job, which was in an actual design studio with nice colourful mugs and work I quite enjoyed doing, I foolishly thought that this would in fact, be the case. I mean I really should have realised that what you actually meant was "we're paying you less than that, we thought you knew though, so either take it or go fuck yourself".
I can also see now that it's really an inspired money saving technique to equip the design studio with computers that were bought back when the Ketchup Song was in the charts and Nickelback just had their first big hit, which would make them SEVEN YEARS old, oh and the software hasn't been updated in three or four years you say? Fantastic! That's just the kind of challenge I so look forward to, nothing makes me happier than a computer that's so slow it makes me want to peel off my eyelids, or a printer that spits out pages with the artwork going sideways for no good reason, not to mention when my computer randomly dies or takes ten minutes to open a bigger-than-average file in Photoshop, that kind of thing just makes me feel so alive, y'know?
Just as a suggestion, you might want to give new employees this handy guide on their first day in their shiny new job, explaining what certain phrases or instructions really mean.
We say:
We want to give this product a new look, move away from the old identity.
We mean:
Make it look the same as the old one, but more obnoxious and garish.
We say:
Yeah, that looks great now.
We mean:
I'll be back in half an hour to get you to change everything while I stand over your shoulder and instruct you to move and resize things in a manner that will make you want to unzip your boot and beat me around the head with it.
We say:
You'll be getting a pay review in four months.
We mean:
You'll be getting a pay review in six months.
We say:
Next time, make sure you get a full brief from us.
We mean:
Next time, don't bother trying to make it look well designed and thought out, just make everything bright red and twice the size it should be. Like how a flyer would look if it was shouting in your face, knocking things over and banging cymbals together. Visually, like.
Thank fuck the Toy Show is on tonight.
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
The Last Station
I just saw this trailer on t'internet and the love interest, Kerry Condon is from my neck of the woods. She was a year above me in school, and knows the sister. Cool. You might also recognise her as the waitress Colin Farrell punches in the opening scene of 'Intermission'.
Is It Just Me...
But this has been bugging me for a while now, this 'divide' between people in a relationship and those who are young free and single. I think it’s safe to say the birth of the divide was Bridget Jones, whose fumbling through life as a single woman in London made us all smile and cheer and proclaim ‘finally’ it’s ok to be single! This has been said before a million times but she really did say what we were all thinking and even though I was only in school when the book came out first, my insecurities were pretty much the same as hers. Fear of looking like an ejit of never having a boyfriend of not being liked by my peers and in constant battle with the bulge. She really was our heroine. But wait hang on a minute didn’t Bridget get the guy in the end? So by process of elimination, wasn’t she now on the other side? Wasn't she now part of a smug couple? Of course not sure they broke up in the second book and all her insecurities came flooding back. Phew! She’s still our heroine! Singles one couples nil.
I was reading ‘U’ magazine last night and there is an article in it about this very topic but I got the feeling that the girl who wrote it is single, she was trying to see things from both sides but to me it didn’t come across like that. And you know that’s fine whatever floats your boat. But since when did it become a bad thing to be in a relationship. Where in between the publication of ‘Bridget Jones’ and the article in this month’s ‘U’ did you become smug having a partner? I’ve been going out with my boyfriend for 7 plus years and I’m very happy, I don’t think I’m smug and I don’t see why I have to feel that it’s almost wrong as a modern women to have a boyfriend and the fact that I want to settle down before I’m thirty is in someway dragging women back to pre suffragette times. I really don’t get it. What exactly is wrong with having a boyfriend and being happy about it? Isn’t it better off now that we can have the career and the independence and be in love at the same time. Or is that just asking for too much. Can we really have it all? (Oh how very Carrie of me)
Now don’t get me wrong I know a few couples myself who might seem smug about their relationship to those on the outside. I know of one girl who feels the need to ring her boyfriend during a night out to tell him how it’s going? Now from a single girls point of view seeing her do that would probably annoy the hell out of you and you might think why does she have to ring him Jesus can she spend one night out without him. But then I can see it from her point of view in that she probably just wants to hear his voice and share her good night out with him I don’t think she does it to show all her single friends that she has a boyfriend in fact I’m sure of it. I wouldn’t do it but she does so just get over it.
Another thing in the article was these 5 points about why you’re better off being single or in a relationship. Apparently when your single you don’t have to feel guilty about spending your grocery shopping in BT’s and that you don’t have to worry about not cleaning up after yourself. You don’t have to worry about not cleaning up after yourself? For fucks sake in any house whether you’re living with your partner living with your mates or living at home. I would hope if you were a dirty bitch someone would tell you to clean the table or wash your dishes anyway, right?
The other myth that annoys me is that married people have also in someway dumbed down after marrying. For example in the article the reporter was going to interview someone for another article, a man, and was looking forward to it. When she told her married friend about her excitement her married friend proclaimed ‘but he’s married!’ So all women in relationships think that single women are predators? And that we should watch our men when they are around? Sure God love them it’s not their fault they swayed when a woman flings herself at him why wouldn’t he? Grr.
Anyway I just wanted to say that having a boyfriend does not a bad modern independent woman make. I have dreams and I want my career to take off and my dreams include wanting to marry my fella and have his babies and build a house. So why does that make me smug? I dont look down on any of my single friends why would I what's the point!
Rant Over
I was reading ‘U’ magazine last night and there is an article in it about this very topic but I got the feeling that the girl who wrote it is single, she was trying to see things from both sides but to me it didn’t come across like that. And you know that’s fine whatever floats your boat. But since when did it become a bad thing to be in a relationship. Where in between the publication of ‘Bridget Jones’ and the article in this month’s ‘U’ did you become smug having a partner? I’ve been going out with my boyfriend for 7 plus years and I’m very happy, I don’t think I’m smug and I don’t see why I have to feel that it’s almost wrong as a modern women to have a boyfriend and the fact that I want to settle down before I’m thirty is in someway dragging women back to pre suffragette times. I really don’t get it. What exactly is wrong with having a boyfriend and being happy about it? Isn’t it better off now that we can have the career and the independence and be in love at the same time. Or is that just asking for too much. Can we really have it all? (Oh how very Carrie of me)
Now don’t get me wrong I know a few couples myself who might seem smug about their relationship to those on the outside. I know of one girl who feels the need to ring her boyfriend during a night out to tell him how it’s going? Now from a single girls point of view seeing her do that would probably annoy the hell out of you and you might think why does she have to ring him Jesus can she spend one night out without him. But then I can see it from her point of view in that she probably just wants to hear his voice and share her good night out with him I don’t think she does it to show all her single friends that she has a boyfriend in fact I’m sure of it. I wouldn’t do it but she does so just get over it.
Another thing in the article was these 5 points about why you’re better off being single or in a relationship. Apparently when your single you don’t have to feel guilty about spending your grocery shopping in BT’s and that you don’t have to worry about not cleaning up after yourself. You don’t have to worry about not cleaning up after yourself? For fucks sake in any house whether you’re living with your partner living with your mates or living at home. I would hope if you were a dirty bitch someone would tell you to clean the table or wash your dishes anyway, right?
The other myth that annoys me is that married people have also in someway dumbed down after marrying. For example in the article the reporter was going to interview someone for another article, a man, and was looking forward to it. When she told her married friend about her excitement her married friend proclaimed ‘but he’s married!’ So all women in relationships think that single women are predators? And that we should watch our men when they are around? Sure God love them it’s not their fault they swayed when a woman flings herself at him why wouldn’t he? Grr.
Anyway I just wanted to say that having a boyfriend does not a bad modern independent woman make. I have dreams and I want my career to take off and my dreams include wanting to marry my fella and have his babies and build a house. So why does that make me smug? I dont look down on any of my single friends why would I what's the point!
Rant Over
Friday, November 20, 2009
Subscribe to:
Posts
(
Atom
)
